it doesn’t matter!

Not even in a sad way, Just in that I should stop worrying about each little thing, and just fucking do what I feel like doing. I came to this after thinking and kind words from the wonderful 42, a regular on this hellish site.

Most of my problems in my everyday life come down to how I view myself, I don’t hate myself (most days) but I’m not happy with my appearance. When I shave my face I like how I look, but after about 6 hours, I look like I hate my 9-to-5 job. My facial hair grows thick and dark. My fix for that is electrolysis, but I have not had the time to do that.

Once that’s solved, I will be confident enough to get a job, and it’s all uphill from there right?

Let’s wait and see. For now, talk soon.

I am the creator of the worst. Gal on the brink of a mental breakdown trying to hold it together. Join me as I riot!

2 Remarks on “it doesn’t matter!

  1. Aww that’s making me smile like an idiot in the middle of class – haven’t done that in a while. I’m glad you were able to find something within my muddled words. I think you should do best to hedge your bets in multiple alleys , so that if one fails the other opens up. I understand (as you know) about not being happy with appearance, and yeah it sucks but well look at yourself! I mean really look, beneath any sort of clothes or skin or anything, within your mind you are a girl yes? Then that is all that matters and every step you take is just trying to make you see yourself how you really feel. I think when people have image problems (like myself) we tend to focus on the worst parts and they devour us, not realising that yeah you can get rid of facial hair, you can do whatever. You don’t need to be perfect you just need to be you. I think you’ll do well and I’m glad you aren’t getting so worked up by the little bits – or at the very least recognise you shouldn’t. I will say that life isn’t a steady slope so don’t expect everything to keep going up and up but it will get better gradually for example, say one day it will go up a bit and maybe the next it will go down but it might not go down as much. Or say one day you’ve had a terrible day and are feeling the worst you’ve felt in weeks, but the next day you don’t feel as bad, that’s a step up! It’s not about never falling it’s about knowing how to get up when you fall.

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